Obsessed
by Gemmadog
Summary: A one shot. How easy it is to become enthralled by the delights social medic feeds us.


**Obsessed.**

This was crazy she thought as she scrolled through his IG account for yet another look. It was 2 a.m. and she had to be up in less than 4 hours. She needed to go to sleep. She should be asleep, like normal people, yet she couldn't resist snooping about him just one more time.

It was now her usual pass time. Gone way beyond a hobby. Something she did about 50 time a day at least, more if she was honest. Constantly on her phone, like most of the population, constantly checking. Obsessed. Yet her obsession was different. She didn't want to know about the latest trends, fashions, gossip. Her obsession was solely about one man. One man who was to her perfect and beautiful in every way. A man who's looks, personality, taste for life all matched the check list she had of her ideal man.

She dreamt about him. Frequently. Spent large periods of her day playing little scenarios around in her head. Acts played out where she was always the principle lady in this beautiful man's world. Plays of them living together, playing together and the very best ones... loving together. Little vignettes where he constantly promised to adore her forever, and she really believed he would.

Yet they were all just dreams. Happy amusements that passed her time away. She pretended to herself it was part of her mindfulness. Her escape from the stressful job she had. Her grasp on sanity, and maybe it was, but then maybe it wasn't. Yet ultimately it was because she was obsessed and secretly in love with a man she had never even met.

No one knew the true level of her infatuation. How deeply, or how often she thought about him. She was almost too ashamed to tell. Instead they all just thought she had given up on love.

Yet here she was in her mid-thirties, reasonably good looking and with no one special in her life. No one to snuggle up to at night. No one to go for walks in the park with, no one to go on holidays with. No one apart from her dream man, her fantasy, who she worshiped from afar and would never have.

To say she'd never met him was not however strictly true. She had met him. Met once him once, alone with him for numerous glorious minutes. Those minutes to her however felt as though they were a life time. To him it probably just meant nothing, but to her in those few minutes she lived more than she had lived for the past five years.

She'd had the good fortune, by grace or design, to be asked to interview him for an up and coming play he was to star in. Some fluke at the magazine office she worked in, which saw her, unbelievably after years of trying a chance to finally meet her idol.

Before the interview she was a bag of nerves. Worried something would go wrong. The interview had already been planned, then altered, then finally, after several anxious days, rearranged. Her stress level were high. The end of her tether almost reached, but finally the day came, and so due to the numerous mix ups that had gone on before, saw them both arrive far to early from the rest of the press, and so had time to kill.

In person. Up close he was more that she had imagined. Perfect, and she didn't do perfect. He offered her a coffee and she readily accepted. Although she hated the stuff, a tea bag did her, but she knew just how much he reportedly loved the stuff, and she therefore wasn't going to refuse. She'd once heard him say in an interview that he wasn't a fully functioning actor without a shot of coffee in him. Following that statement up with a heart blowing stare, that penetrated everyone who watched, and then came that boyish laugh that had melted her core.

She watched as he moved around the table in the press hall making their drinks. He was so much more beautiful up close. His hair longer and bushier that she'd seen it before (and she'd seen a lot of pictures of him), his brown eyes sparking as he moved around. He was excited about the up and coming project she could tell. It showed on every magnificent plane of his chiselled face. His smile constant, flashing his perfect teeth surrounded by the most kissable of lips.

When he handed her the coffee cup their fingers touched. She nearly died there and then. The ache for him was so intense. Her hold body was wanting to lean into his and take him. Obviously though she didn't. She remained professional and polite. She monitored every movement of his face to see if he too felt the electricity of their touch. She was disappointed as it was obvious he didn't, as he remained just polite, instead of ravaging her there and then in the most carnal of ways possible!

They spoke of basic, bland things. Sitting opposite each other on the hard unwelcoming chairs laid out for the press. Their knees almost touching. Almost but not quite, though she accepted it was better than nothing. He laughed, his beautiful laugh, at some of her comments and remarks. Sometimes shyly smiling up at her as she talked. She hadn't set out to be funny, that was the last thing on her mind today. She'd set out to be sensual, attention grabbing. She'd set out to be the one that drove him to distraction, like he drove her. She set out to be the one he couldn't live without, but all she seemed she had achieved was that she'd won him around with her charm and magnetism!

They talked about where they came from. She knew his entire life story but didn't let on. She politely listened as he talked about his home town. Hers was London. His was Bath. They talked of families. He an only child, (she knew that), she was one of six (he didn't know that, but then again why would he?). She knew already, before today, but as they talked she realised they couldn't be more different if they tried, both in backgrounds and in stature.

He was tall, 6' 2", she wasn't, 5' 5". He was an Adonis amongst men. Could command an Army if needed. Whereas she, though not bad looking, couldn't even command her coco pops to fall into the bowl properly on a morning. They were opposites. Even if she could muster up the courage to ask him, to get him to be fond of her eventually, she knew he was out of her league and all she could do was worship him from afar.

Their time was too short for her, she knew it would be. The rest of the press soon started to flow into the room and he excused himself with a dazzling smile and that ovary tickling giggle. For a moment, just a moment, before he turned away from her she thought he was going to say something. Ask something. His head dipped and his mouth turned into an 'O' shape, his face became serious, as he was about to start to speak. Then he stopped. Nodded his head once or twice, then turned on his heels and left.

That had been months and months and months ago. 256 days to be exact. She was definitely counting. Since then her obsession with him had only managed to increased. They used to say you should never meet your heroes, because they were sure to disappoint you. How very wrong they were in this case. Her Facebook, IG, and Twitter hunting of him continued to take up the majority of her days.

She wasn't sure exactly what it was about him that enthralled her so. Yet something did. Convinced that this man, unlike all those others would be the one who wouldn't hurt her, who wouldn't cheat on her. Instead he would be the one who thought she was brilliant, who would be proud of her, who would love her.

She admitted it. She'd been unlucky with men. Her first great love turned out to be a great big cheater. She'd invested many years with him, too many, only to find all her dreams, and hopes had been built on his big fat lies. She was cruelly let down in the worst way possible by him when, she discovered her best friend and him together one evening in their downstairs cloakroom. Classy! An affair that had been going on for years, and everyone knew about it, everyone but her. She'd felt foolish and lost. Everything she'd had just crumbled away in that moment. Her heart broken. Never to trust again. Never to look at a man again. Or so she thought, until that day scrolling through the internet she'd clicked on a video of him in some tv drama, and she was hooked. Addicted. Obsessed.

Over the years her friends had tried many a time to set her up with mutual friends. Blind dates...at her age! People who they 'just knew she'd get on with'. Once or twice she bowed to pressure and she tried, once or twice it had spectacularly failed. She didn't even want to think about the knee trembler behind the back of an Indian take away she regretfully been involved in! Yet she knew it wasn't right. She couldn't hide herself away for ever, apart from him there must be someone else out there who was perfect for her.

"You look beautiful." He said as he kissed her cheek.

She smiled as he'd obviously lied, though she appreciated his effort.

How or why she agreed to this she'd never know? How or why she agreed to meet him for lunch she'd never know? How or why that these two were even friends she often wondered? Yet here she was with her best mate in the whole world. The man she'd know since they were four, and both had been put on the naughty step in kindergarten for 'setting free' the school gerbil.

He simply was her best friend. Gorgeous, loyal and a hit with the ladies...and a total cad to boot. Not one, she knew, to trust with your heart. A player of lady's affections, and Molly was glad that she never, not once, had any feelings apart from friendship towards her mate... the guy she called Elvis.

"So seeing anyone?" He asked almost as soon as they sat down.

"No." Was her reply.

Silence then loomed as they scanned the restaurant's menu.

They met as often as his crazy, around the world, job would allow them to meet. Fitting her in between his latest conquest and his big crazy family, that she loved as much as she loved him.

He was a camera man. A very good camera man, and went absolutely everywhere with his job. In high demand and apparently excellent at what he did. He'd met them all, the rich, the famous, and even the infamous ones. Always had a tale to tell, and always made Molly envious of his lifestyle, and his ability to take love from others without having to give any back.

She'd once asked him what made him so good at his job? How it happened that he had become so successful? An east end lad from a normal housing estate living the global wild child highlife. He used to modestly say it was because he was lucky. That Lady Luck had smiled on him, but once and only once, he'd admitted to her it was because he was so vain. So caught up in his own looks and how he came across that he was able to apply that vanity from behind the lens to in front of it. He wanted the best, and therefore made those he filmed the best.

"Mols?" He started after their orders had been taken.

She looked at him. Resigned at the conversation that they were about to have.

Twice, thrice a year it would happen. He'd take her to a very fancy restaurant, be all nice and concerned and then he'd pounce. He'd lull her into a false sense of security, ply her with several drinks, and then he'd attack. It was a practiced campaign he led, but always, so far, an unsuccessful one.

"Elvis." Was all she replied back. Steeling herself for what was to come.

"This ain't right Mols. You've got to get back out there. Live a little." He said as his opening move.

"I am living thank you very much." She replied back.

He laughed.

"What? You're joking right. You spend your days going to work, coming home from work, feeding your cats and that's about it." He sighed. "Mols that ain't living. Even nuns have more fun than you."

She raised an eyebrow at his comment about the nuns. Not ever wanting to go there as to how he knew that piece of intel. She has sat and listened to him over the years to so much that made her blush He'd had too many tales to tell, too many conquests in the most unlikely of places, with the most unlikely people, and because of that he therefore had the most unlikely stories to retell. One memorable one, she mused over, was one which involved a three way, with the female members of a state athletic squad, and a punch line that included the confusing line 'can I tickle your monkey?". She never asked and never, she was certain, ever wanted to hear the details of that encounter.

"Look Elvis. It's hard." She pleaded with him. "I am just picky I guess."

"Picky Molly would imply you even look!" He shot back.

Then he drew his breath. Here it comes she thought. The final attack. The master at work.

"Look Molly. I've been thinking..."

"Sounds dangerous." She giggled out. She loved teasing him so much, but even this friendship had limits and she didn't want Elvis to cross them. Yet he continued right on.

"I've met this man." He gushed out.

"Oh congratulations." She quickly interjected. "Is it love? Does he feel the same about you?"

"Will you shut the fuck up." Elvis yelled a bit too loudly as the other diners turned and stared in his direction. Elvis however was oblivious.

"I know this guy who would be perfect for you. I just know it." He smiled. Trying to calm himself after her childish interjection.

"Yeah? Why's that then?" She challenged him.

"Well he's funny, good looking, a bit shy too... like you." He offered. "Good looking and all." He repeated for good measure.

"So why's he single then? And more to the point mate, why does he need a blind date and a cocky camera man to set him up?" She asked.

"Like I said he's shy." Elvis replied. "That and well his job. Makes it difficult to meet genuine people you know?"

"What does he do? An axe murderer, priest, stripper?" She asked. She on some level was loving this.

Elvis ignored her.

"Look Mols he's a class guy. One of the best. You should give him a go."

"Shit Elvis you make it sound like I'm buying a car or summit." She stared. "Anyway the answers no."

"Please Mols for me." He begged.

She saw this genuine pleading look on his face. It confused her briefly.

"Elvis what going on?" She asked. This was more than just a blind date with an acquaintance. There was something else going on she knew it.

"Look…..thing is. He's lonely. Been unlucky in love and that. I felt sorry for him."

"What the fuck have you done? Elvis?" Molly slowly spat out.

"Well he's in town shooting a film for a couple of months. We're working together actually, and I kind of mentioned I had a friend..."

He never finished his sentence. She leaned forward from her seat and hissed.

"You've already bleeding told him I'd meet him?" She snarled.

Elvis had the good grace to look sheepish.

"Well yeah. I didn't think you'd mind. You're kind of doing me a favour and that." He said.

"A favour Elvis? A fucking favour? What am I 'rent a girl' or something?" She moved to stand.

He stalled her and held onto her hand. He saw the fire in her eyes and knew he'd fucked up big time.

"Sorry Mols." Was all he managed to say before she stormed off.

She'd sighed for the thousandth time that day. There had been no new pics, stories, or Tweets from him for several days. That worried her. Wondering what he was up to? Who he was with? Still she filled her time in with revisiting the old ones of him and making up more exciting daydreams to keep her dull life bright in a small corner of her mind.

She looked up from her seat and saw the delivery man walking through the office. Holding an impressive bunch of flowers. She knew straight away who they'd be from. Thanking the delivery man and explaining to her work colleagues, who were eaten up with curiosity, that they were just from a friend, she dialled the number.

"Ok you tosser. I forgive you." She said as soon as he answered.

"Thank God." He laughed back. "Take it the flowers arrived?"

"Oh hell yeah. I'll be asked about them for weeks you moron." She laughed back.

"So? He asked. "Changed your mind?"

She watched from the small room she's moved to for some privacy. She watched the office's coming and goings. Watched the young and not so young friends, work colleagues, interact with each other. Smile, laugh, tease and suddenly she felt very lonely.

"Yeah. Ok. Go on then." The words were out of her mouth before she had time to consider them.

"Really Mols. That's great." Elvis shot back amazed. "Shit. Right. I'll set it all up for you"

He went before she could change her mind, and she just felt so lonely she was unsure if for once she would change her mind.

Elvis was true to his word. He set it all up and he set it all up quickly. A couple of nights later she found herself dressing in her best, waiting for her 'date'.

She arrived early, and was shown straight to the bar area to wait. She garnered some admiring glances as she entered and it boosted her confidence. For once she had made a proper effort for this date. Wearing a light summery dress and heels, leaving her long brown hair loose but shining in the evening sun.

It was time she had decided to start living again. To try a new experience, to deal with the real men out there and lessen her hearts hold on the man she 'dated' via social media alone.

She glanced at her phone checking again she was in the right restaurant, on the right day that Elvis has planned. She avoided drinking before he came, already ridiculously nervous, and sat sipping her tonic water just waiting.

He was late. She was starting to get annoyed. She, so far had resisted the temptation to play on her phone while she waited, but now bored she couldn't stop herself. She hadn't 'check in' on him all day. Wanting to give real life a chance, hard though it was. But here alone, she gave in. One last fix she promised herself, before her date arrived. One final fix trawling through his IG account, Facebook page to see if there were any further updates from him.

There was nothing. He wasn't known for his social media 'shares', so when he did she had saved them all. Maybe she thought this was a sign. His silence was telling her to move on. Leave him behind. She stared at the numerous pictures she had of him before she was pulled back into the real world and had to resolutely decided to focus on her date.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw movement and heard Elvis' name being mention regarding a table reservation. An apology for being late was then offered and directions given that the young lady in question was waiting for him at the bar.

She looked one last time at the face of her perfect man saved on her phone. She silently said goodbye to the fiction, determined to focus on the fact. Looking for one last time into his chocolate brown eyes, gazing at his perfect smile. And then she hit delete.

Just like that he was gone. Gone from her phone and hopefully from the daydream like world she had been living in for too long. She only hoped that this date was worth it, but even if it wasn't she knew she had at least tired. 

She turned and pushed her phone into her coat pocket on the back of the chair. Her hair hung over her face so when she turned she didn't notice him straight away, standing in front of her, smiling at her. He had such a beautiful smile.

When she did look up she was speechless. He stood close, by her chair. He seemed as nervous as she was. She watched mesmerised as one of his hands raked through his brown curls, while the other was outstretched in a greeting.

She took real life all in. Standing right there in front of her. He had a beautiful smile, on his beautiful face. His brown eyes fluttered in the late sunlight. Darting across her face for acknowledgment. Reassurance.

She just stared at him.

Unbelieving. The magic of it all only increased as she heard him finally say. 

"Hello Molly. I'm Charles."


End file.
